Not better
Not better

My Medical Journal No 7

My right foot drop is no better.   I am developing atrophy of those denervated muscles. As the muscle atrophy,  I believe  my leg gets heavier to lift because it requires more effort,  I tire more easily and injure myself more often.   Most alarmingly is the buckling of my right leg/knee when I put my full weight on that leg.   Remarkably,  I am learning to live with this, at times,  I forget and  move too quickly.

Other symptoms noted:

  • Daily cold then numb fingers and toes on touching anything cold– washing my hands under cold water or drinking water from a cold glass. The numbness is discomforting, at times painful, lasting hours with color changes in my fingers and toes. I wear socks on feet and hands to keep them warm. This is getting worse.
  • I think my right leg is numb. When I injure it I do not feel pain. For example, a heavy book landed  on my right foot and I did not feel it or pain,  I do not feel pain when I stub my right toes while I do when I stub my left toes.    I feel pain when I twist my left ankle not my right  ankle which I do often.
  • Finally, I am developing some weakness in my right hand. I drop  things and I have difficulty lifting and holding onto heavy objects with my right dominant hand. The weakness is subtle and does not bother me unless I try to lift heavy objects which I no longer do.

Still no brace…went to the wrong place…they have the prescription and said they would take care of things….I am still waiting. I have two upcoming appointments with neurologists, one with my general neurologist and the other with a peripheral nerve specialist.

I wonder if I have some type of autoimmune process, a vasculitis,  given the numbness in my fingers and toes along with the stiffness in my hands   Not sure if I had an ESR or CRP when I was admitted about 2 months ago. Another thing to check on.   While my back feels better I still have pain that keeps me in bed  and I believe this pain radiates to my lower abdomen where I seem to have more and more discomfort.

Our healthcare delivery system does not make it easy to accomplish simple tasks. I have yet to have social service take a real interest in helping me. When last I checked I called and left messages that was before the new year…I am still waiting. I  have great difficulty and would like social services but I am tired of calling and the truth be known I don’t want strangers around me.

Our healthcare delivery system sucks because it does not deliver HEALTH or CARE….I wonder where does the money go and why are there so many services not available to those who need them.

Tired of waiting....
Tired of waiting….