Lately, I have been trying to figure out how I got here and why I can’t stop falling? I thought I hit rock bottom, but that was a cliff. It broke the fall, briefly, but man, was I banged up?
I am juggling too many things for one person. Why bother? It occurred to me that I don’t need a mammogram. If it’s positive, I don’t want treatment. Going through TBI (traumatic brain injury) alone, I can’t do it with cancer too. If I am not going to do screening, why bother to take meds that make me tired, anxious, or suicidal. Along those lines, I don’t need a covid vaccine.
Why bother to fight the inevitable? Instead, I want to plan for the end of my life–no heroic measures or life-saving treatments. I want cremation. How do I start the process? I want to prepay.